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Writer's pictureStacy

Envy

Ever read about someone else’s story and feel tension growing in you?

Is it envy?

What can envy tell us? Envy, no matter how it reacts in your body, as negativity towards others or negatively toward yourself, envy has a message.

The message I got today, after reading about the success of an author sharing her story, was that I wanted what she has.

What I felt was an idea of success. Success in putting out her expression, freedom to do what she loves, and not being tied down to a certain, structure. Of course, this is my distorted view, this is envy for me. I felt like I’m not good enough, I’m not talented, or know the right people, or just smart enough.

Then this question came up, “ Can you love yourself enough, to give that to yourself?”

At that moment, I realized that I need to build confidence in my body, to take action, to allow it to do whatever it is I need to do. Allow myself to release from fear of imperfection, which causes conflict when not meeting other people’s expectations.

The real question is can I love myself enough, to take that chance? To stop expecting my body to be something she is not. To create a connection and relationship to the changing needs of my body, as I move into another chapter of life.

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