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In this moment of my life, I finally feel a confidence that is grounding and nourishing to my soul. A feeling of my being and my body, integrated and aligned.
Before, whenever I felt confident in myself, I did notice this hint of ….hummm…what I feel now as arrogance. I think that’s what I thought confidence was, a sort of arrogance. In those moments, when I felt that type of confidence, I also felt a dark feeling of loneliness, and as if I were going to fall.
Confidence now feels different.
It feels alive, and growing. Confidence is knowing my skills and function in this world, and feeling depth of truth, through experiences and sensations in my body. Truth of my existence here and now, of my human imperfection, even in moments I instinctually strive for excellence and perfection! (lol)
This confidence comes from years of seeking and searching, this is NOT an overnight success story to confidence. (and if you read my thoughts on success, you already get that 🙂 ) I feel trust in myself and life itself (basically, ’cause this is an ongoing practice) , and maybe it comes with experience, and maybe with the inner work in circle, and my Buddhist practices as my foundation to understanding and observing of life, that I see a little more clearly.
Day by day, I intend to polish my life, clear out the impurities of the past and present, to create clarity of truth, clarity of perception through all sensations, as I swim in the muddy waters of life. I will reach out my hand, in the intention to move through and cleanse our thoughts, our words, our actions, and our waters will once again become crystal clear.
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